Some Poignancy And Smartass Musings

Considerations by Gary Hambley

SPASM #2 – Learn How To Walk!

Learn How To Walk!

A goodly amount of people do not know how to walk. Oh yeah they do move around on their own two feet but are utterly clueless as to what is going on around them or where they are in space. Those walking around utterly clueless bugs the shit out of me!

If the people that don’t have clue one on how to walk drove like they walk, their insurance rates would be prohibitive because of all the accidents they’d of been in. Then there are the collisions the dumb asses not paying attention aren’t part of that people trying to avoid their inattentive dumb ass are having.

If you’re in a store, out on the sidewalk, where ever the hell you decide to stop. Don’t just throw the brakes on because you’re probably causing a pile up behind you. You wouldn’t do it driving so don’t do it when you’re walking.

Pay attention and get your dumb ass out of the travel path. People shouldn’t have to ask you to move or try and go around because you got your dumb ass blocking traffic! Driving, you wouldn’t stop in a lane and have a conversation with someone or throw the brakes on to stop and look at something that caught your eye. Apply the same principle to walking!

Probably the most important, don’t be stopping in the middle of a crosswalk to look at your damn phone! Not only do you piss off the pedestrians you inconvenience the drivers too!

No one should even have to ask let alone have to raise their voice and ask a second time to get you the inattentive dumb ass to move out of the damn way. Be attentive and considerate and move your dumb ass to the side.

Walking while looking at a phone should carry the same penalties as driving while on the phone.

Not being attentive while you waltzing yourself around with your head firmly up your dumb ass can have other penalties. The helicopter phone is one that carries a dual penalty.

I was out on Roller Blades and a dumb ass with his arm outstretched phone in hand steps on to the bicycle and blade path I’m skating on without looking. I aint going slow either! I got no where to go. I can’t go wide because of oncoming traffic. If I go on to the grass at the speed I’m moving, I’m getting hurt. I did the only thing I could, dipped my shoulder and hit that outstretched arm. The phone went helicoptering away. I’m pretty certain with me being almost 6’ close to 200 pounds that arm I hit got some pretty decent bruising. All I can say is to damn bad dumb ass!

I will try and miss a little kid. Man or woman, you’re getting hit. If it means I’m going to be tearing up my legs and going down in a heap because you were careless and or stupid, it aint happening, you are getting hit!

You’ll look both ways crossing a street. Well at least I hope you do or you’ll be wearing a car real soon. Look both ways crossing a blade and bicycle path too.

Walking and talking and not paying attention and expecting people to be looking out for them because they feel they are entitled to walk around oblivious to what is taking place around them.

If you’re someone who doesn’t know how to drive, LEARN! Once you’ve learned how to drive, WALK LIKE YOU DRIVE AND QUIT PISSING PEOPLE OFF!

That’ll do it for now.

G.R. Hambley – all rights reserved
August 24, 2015

For those of you who don’t know how to use a washroom see here.

Next posting, something so ugly the designers, to use a phrase outside the politically correct world, “they should be shot and peed on and not necessarily in that order!


Exercise your own intelligent donkey!

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